Days ago, I visited my girlfriend at her parents' home at night. Everything went nice but that's a story for another day. I left their place late in the night, and taxis, which are the commonest means of transport were scarce. So I had to use a bodaboda(motorcycle), which is the fastest. Now as we'al know, or as you're yet to know, most boda guys (guys who ride motorcycles for money) are quite illiterate, or their education level is really low, which means their reasoning capacity is expected to be relatively low.
But this guy was way different. He was very fluent in English, updated and talking a lot of sense. We talked from when I sat on his bodaboda to my destination. And if you wondering what we were talking about, wonder no more. It was what men talk about the second most, of course after soccer, women, probably because he saw me hugging my girl soo tight as I said goodnight before sitting on his bodaboda.
He started by asking where we met, how long has been our relationship and all that, after when he started.
He said, "Listen to me young man(I think he was in his late 20's, which obviously makes me his junior), Women are very complicated creatures. I can see from the way you hugged your girl, that you really love her, and kinda committed."
Me: Yes I do.
Him: Does she love you as much as you do?
Me: Yes she does.
Him: How sure are you?
Me: She tells me, She shows it. I believe her and trust her.
Him: "Oh that's good for you. But ask yourself, what do you get from that relationship? Or what do you wana get from it? Is it just for fun or do you wana get married to that girl sometime in the future? And if the latter is true, are you sure that's the person you wana spend the rest of your life with?
"I was a bit silent to him because of a few reasons. First, my mind was totally blown because this is a boda guy, people who are kinda despised because of their job, talking a lot of sense to me. So I was tryna process that. Second thing is, I was also tryna weight the worth of my relationship. What was I really getting outta it!? And obviously, he was a stranger. So I replied, "Yes, I'm getting love and at the moment it's enough for me. And also, it's true sometime in the future, I wana marry this girl."
He laughed and then said, "Okay that's good for you. But what about her? What does she get outta this relationship? Does she know you are planning to marry her one day? Is she committed as well? Norman(he'd learnt my name), you say at the moment, her love towards you is enough, but what if your love towards her isn't enough. What if she wants more outta this relationship?"
Me: She'd have told me that already, or let me know in any way.
Him: "Get to know this young man, women are receptive. They want to be given all the time. And if you are lucky to afford to give, you should never expect anything in return, I think you know this works even in other parts of life. Anything she gives you should be taken as a bonus." I interrupted and said, "I understand man." At some extent I felt like asking him why he's doing such a job when he can reason this intelligently, but I didn't because I thought he'd get offended.
He continued, "And if at one point you kinda fail to provide, she might not directly show it to you, but know she'll be very disappointed. She'll see you as less a man. And you can't blame her, because even in the beginning, God told Adam to sweat for Eve." If you wondering the time within which we conversed all this, he was riding quite slowly, and my destination was a few miles away.
You know how someone can talk and they own you all, you listen to errthing they say and get lost for words to say back because they're so on point, and so you wana here more of it, that's what happened that night. I wish I could ride on his bike every time I was going somewhere.
Good advice is good advice no matter who gives it to you. This was one thing »» BRILLIANT
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